The New 7 Year Itch

I recently read in an article that the "3 Year Glitch" has replaced the "7 year itch." Apparently in these modern times people are so rushed that they also rush through the stages. What you might have first thought of as quirky is sooner rather than later... annoying. All those little habits like snoring, twitching, sneezing, and picking that you thought you could live with and even laughed about have become the bane of your existence. I really do find it sad that these days people just seem to get tired of one another quicker. Plus it is easier to replace the accustomed "annoying" back to the "quirky" really quickly. To all of you get towards that 3 year glitch just keep in mind the new model you might want to upgrade to will eventually become the annoying someday. Stay invested and create boundaries you can both live with happily.

Comments 3 year glitch survivors???

Tip of the Day

When You Think It's Done... It's Done.

Dating can sometimes feel like you're training for a marathon. You put in so much time and effort into something that should be rewarding and fun, but sometimes it just doesn't turn out that way. What people need to realize is that no one person is your "perfect match." That is why dating is so essential because you need to know what you like or dislike in a relationship. If you have gotten to the point where it feels more like a factory line job, doing the same routine everyday and you are both miserable... then bow out. It could be the best thing for both of you. Now, I'm not saying to give up at the slightest malfunction, but if you have been giving it a try for awhile and its not working, cut your losses. When you feel like it's done, then its done. 

Are You A Bad Dater?

There are as many type of daters out there as there are stars in the sky, but there are some general categories  you could fall into. If you find that you are unsuccessful at dating there could be a multitude of reasons why, but I'm confident there are some easy solutions. First, you need to identify what kind of dater you are. Since there are several I'm going to mention the top three most popular types.

1. The Reluctant Dater.  You are the lost soul that second guesses everything about dating. You have a hard time even putting yourself out there to begin with because you view dating as this big, black hole that might suck you in and never let your miserable soul back out again. 
2. The Nervous Dater. You are someone who gets so nervous about the thought of putting yourself out there that sheer panic tends to make you miss out on golden opportunities. Once you do put yourself out into the dating scene you tend to freeze during those perfect moments to show your witty sense of humor. Then you spend the rest of the date replaying that moment in your head and thinking what you "wish" you would have said and imagining the charming laugh from your date.
3. The Fall-Back Dater. You are always falling back into the same bland relationships with the same bland types of people. You know how to handle those types and, either think you don't deserve a better type or you aren't confident enough to know you do deserve a better type. 

If any of these types remotely describe what you go through when you think about yourself dating then you need a little help to get you out of your bad habits.  I think most people just need a little back-up from someone who knows tips to help them navigate their way through a very exciting time in their lives.

If you find yourself in any of these three categories please contact me for helpful tips to put you on the right track. 

Tip of the Day

Momma Said There'll Be Days Like This... 

Some of us were just blessed with mothers who seem to know or want to know everything about your life... even dating. And most likely somewhere along the line you did go crying to someone "mother" like when your heart was broken or things just weren't going right. My mother always said "There are other fish in the sea," and she was right. (Thanks MKS.) Just because your relationship/ dating experience didn't work out the way you want, don't crawl into a hole. Pick yourself up, reevaluate what you really want your significant other to be like, and then have fun trying to find them. So, Thanks MOM!

Just Play!

While SORRY!, LIFE, Scrabble, and UNO are all really fun games to play with your date, I would suggest picking up a console. There are so many games to choose from these days you should be able to choose one that incorporates both of your tastes. My advice would be to play a video game of some sort for a third or fourth date. By that time you should have at least 1. met in public and 2. done something that you both have in common or at least one of you is passionate about. The next date should be cozy, relaxed, and fun, BUT not boring or awkward (i.e. movie on the couch) Side Note: I discourage inviting someone over during the first few dates for a movie because it doesn't allow you to learn anything new about the other person. It just creates an atmosphere charged with nervous energy and awkward silence. Plus you will be thinking "What happens after the movie?" the entire time during the movie... so what's the point. 

Solution: Gaming. 

Being able to add a competitive edge to your date will show how your chemistry has evolved. By this point you will be comfortable to be more playful with each other. So jump on the couch or get active with the Wii Controllers and have a great time egging each other on. And remember to not be a sore loser even if you are super competitive. They don't need to find that out till after you're dating and think your already adorable enough to keep around. 

Tip of the Day

Don't Nitpick

Yes there is always something about someone that bugs the crap out of you. Whether they are a nail biter, fast talker, interrupter, or just plain all over the place. Please, take moment to think before biting their face off. If this relationship is something you want to last then stop, breath, and then react. Don't attack someone about their flaws because that will lead to self consciences and most likely a break up. Take a moment out of a day when they are NOT doing the thing that bothers you and bring it up. (IF you have been dating more than 6 months and have a comfortable, open relationship.) Don't be offended when they come back with your flaw that annoys them. Learn from this and if its workable... fix it. If it's not.. hit the road.

Tip of the Day

They Didn't Call Back Because....

After every first date men and women alike go through this emotional phase I like to call the "PHONE RING PLEAASSEEEE!!!" phase. This is brought on by the fact that you had such a good time on the date that you can't wait to see that person again. BUT.. you don't quite know how that person felt about you. So you pace around the room and stare at your cell phone waiting for the phone call that might never come. So here is the tip, before you part ways at the end of the night ASK for a second date. If you feel that strongly that you had a great time and you want to see where this will go, just go for it. Ask for a second date and plan it with them in your presence. Example: " I had a great time with you tonight, especially your (insert funny moment or great story). Would you like to get together sometime this week? I was wanting to go to the (insert someplace you have a common interest in) and would rather go with you, since we have that in common." This way you won't be sitting around waiting for an answer of whether they had a good time or not. Plus you'll look confident and fascinating at the same time.